Thank Gosh It's Friday!
I can't believe I've made it through a whole work week...again! Wow. Only 7300 days of work left until retirement. How motivating. :-)
Well...this week had its moments. I experienced a slight meltdown Thursday morning. Don't know why, only that tears were very close to the surface, and even emerged at one point. Poor Joey. He not only has to handle stress at his crazy job but he has to endure my emotions as well. He must be made of stout stuff!
Anyway, back to the meltdown....I think I was picking on myself yesterday. I was being self-critical, analyzing my every thought, deed, and emotion which left me feeling woefully insufficient. "I am not perfect!" I cried out in my head. I have check lists in my head that I use as daily reminders of what a "good" wife, employee, and follower of Christ is supposed to be. I know I had not lived up to my own expectations of performace in these areas and so I did what any mature person would do...cry.
So, how do I reconcile this attitude with that of Christ? Simple. I can't. Not on my own anyway. I have got to learn to settle down and let His Truth (grace, love, and mercy through His gift of salvation)pull my actions and emotions. Too often, I let me emotions pull me down a path that is full of darkness, weeds, and hidden dangers. As we discussed at our small group on Wednedsay, we must "transform ourselves through the renewing of our minds in Christ Jesus". I am painfully aware that at this very moment, I have not loved God, spent time with Him, honored Him or worshiped Him in the way that He desires at all this week. I tremble for myself. This selfish flesh always turns back to itself, looking for fulfillment and satisfaction, foregoing the thirst-quenching goodness of the Lord.
Father in heaven, help me in my disobedience. I have forsaken You and I am sorry. Please help me find my way back to You. Give me hope and peace, that You will be glorified in all I say and do. Thank you for loving me in spite of myself. And thank you too for my companion and best friend Joey. He is definitely my heart. Amen.
Instead of Thank Gosh Its Friday, maybe I should say "Thank Gosh I'm Found"! TGIF indeed!