TGIF

Thank Gosh It's Friday!

I can't believe I've made it through a whole work week...again! Wow. Only 7300 days of work left until retirement. How motivating. :-)

Well...this week had its moments. I experienced a slight meltdown Thursday morning. Don't know why, only that tears were very close to the surface, and even emerged at one point. Poor Joey. He not only has to handle stress at his crazy job but he has to endure my emotions as well. He must be made of stout stuff!

Anyway, back to the meltdown....I think I was picking on myself yesterday. I was being self-critical, analyzing my every thought, deed, and emotion which left me feeling woefully insufficient. "I am not perfect!" I cried out in my head. I have check lists in my head that I use as daily reminders of what a "good" wife, employee, and follower of Christ is supposed to be. I know I had not lived up to my own expectations of performace in these areas and so I did what any mature person would do...cry.

So, how do I reconcile this attitude with that of Christ? Simple. I can't. Not on my own anyway. I have got to learn to settle down and let His Truth (grace, love, and mercy through His gift of salvation)pull my actions and emotions. Too often, I let me emotions pull me down a path that is full of darkness, weeds, and hidden dangers. As we discussed at our small group on Wednedsay, we must "transform ourselves through the renewing of our minds in Christ Jesus". I am painfully aware that at this very moment, I have not loved God, spent time with Him, honored Him or worshiped Him in the way that He desires at all this week. I tremble for myself. This selfish flesh always turns back to itself, looking for fulfillment and satisfaction, foregoing the thirst-quenching goodness of the Lord.

Father in heaven, help me in my disobedience. I have forsaken You and I am sorry. Please help me find my way back to You. Give me hope and peace, that You will be glorified in all I say and do. Thank you for loving me in spite of myself. And thank you too for my companion and best friend Joey. He is definitely my heart. Amen.

Instead of Thank Gosh Its Friday, maybe I should say "Thank Gosh I'm Found"! TGIF indeed!

Saturday Mornings

I LOVE Saturday mornings...the quiet, the still, the smell of coffee brewing, walking outside to pick up the paper in the crisp morning air. This is how I wish it could be every morning. It is just so restful after a long week of work, deadlines, and chores. When I am in the moment of a quiet Saturday morning, I can understand why Jesus liked to get up early and go pray. No one pulling on Him, asking questions, begging to be healed. And if Jesus needed this time alone (and He is God in the flesh), then doesn't it make sense that little, broken, frail human beings like us need that quiet too?

Dear Father in heaven...thank you so much for the still and quiet of a Saturday morning. I thank you for rest during the night and the good strong coffee this morning. Help me Lord to honor you and praise you the way in which you deserve, for all the wonderful blessings you have chosen to give me. My husband, my family, my friends, my work....it all comes from you dear Lord. THANK YOU. Help me continue to reflect upon your goodness and mercy the rest of the day. AMEN

Today

Well, I am really going to try this blogging thing for real. I think writing can be cathartic and a healthy way to express your joys, thoughts, ideas, and frustrations! However, I am famous for starting something and not finishing it (like Weight Watchers, exercise 3X per week, reading my bible faithfully, etc..) So, here goes nothing (literally) for today....

Today...I have been battling a testy little headache at work. Work is good but I am getting easily distracted which isn't hard with my attention span. The sun is shining but it's still VERY cold outside. I wish it were warmer but at least the days are getting longer. I am ready to start a real flower garden this spring and summer; however, please refer back to opening statement. I wonder if I'll have the grit and determination to start AND finish my gardening dreams and endeavors. HGTV makes it seem way too easy anyway...and I am sure I could have a designer backyard if I had a crew of about 20 people with a big TV production budget to match. Ha! But, I'll try it and see if it "sticks". I have the feeling that gardening is therapuetic. Pulling weeds and hacking at stubborn roots has got to make one feel pretty good, especially at the end of a long day. Holy cow...I've just written an entire paragraph on "gardening". What is up with me?

To end this pointless and meandering blog, I am going conclude with a description of the rest of today's itinerary. Tonight, I am to dine with donors and students at Berry's annual Scholarship Night with my sweet husband Joey. He's such a good sport to go along. (Don't tell him he doesn't have to go!) Hopefully, the food will be good and the evening will be short!

Also, I am skipping my scheduled run today due to aforementioned "testy headache". I really resent this headache because I have some good wine at home that I really want to enjoy.